Dear Ms. Forbsworth, my divine aristocratic lady!

How are you? How is your new job as a nightclub stripper? They tell me that you’ve been dressing (or should I say ‘undressing’?) as a Victorian aristocratic lady. Nice touch! I can’t hope/wait (‘Can’t wait’ is a standard way to express the idea of ‘to look forward to’ or ‘to await with excitement’.) to see you in action. I bet you are thesexiest/most sexy (‘Sexy’ is a word that ends in the letter ‘y’ and therefore, has the comparative ‘sexier’ and the superlative ‘sexiest’.) girl in Soho.

I too, have been given some interesting job/work.(‘Work’ is, of course, uncountable, and needs to be used with ‘some’. Jobs are countable.)  Jack wants me to teach Ali Fred how to speak English. Do you know him? He’s the onegetting married/to get married (For future arrangements we like to use the present continuous.) to Lady Sara Winthorpe next week. He’s giving me an expense account! All I have to do is teach this guy a little of/a bit about (A ‘little’ and a ‘bit’ are basically the same, but ‘a little’ doesn’t need a preposition.) British culture. He wants me to take him to lots of cultural places like the British Museum and the Tate Gallery, eat with him in the best restaurants, and teach him a bit of diplomatic English. What an easy job! I was thinking in/about(Another important dependent preposition. ‘Think’ is always followed by ‘about’ or ‘of’.) keeping the money, and just taking him to normal places like cafés/coffees (‘Coffee’ is only the thing that you drink; a ‘café’ is a cheap restaurant.) and bars. Above all/After all,(‘Above all’ means ‘most importantly’ and is thus incorrect. ‘After all’ means ‘the fact is…’) if he wants to learn about real British culture, there is no better way to do it than among ‘real’ people, not ‘posh’ snobs in ‘snotty’ restaurants. I have another small group of foreign students arriving this afternoon; I’ll probably take them with me too. I was thinking that it would be a good idea to do a kind of ‘alternative tour’ of all the tackiest and naffest places. What do you think? Do you want to know/meet them? (‘To know’ is a verb used to talk about knowledge of a subject, rather than a person. ‘To meet’ is used when you are introduced to someone for the first time, or if you have known them all your life.) We may/could (‘Could’ is a modal auxiliary verb that is sometimes used for suggestions. ‘May’ expresses either possibility or permission, but would be inappropriate here as Zak Washington is making a suggestion.)  meet tomorrow in the café, if you feel like it. Send me a message and let me know.

                Zak Washington.